Masturline is an 18+ 1-800 dating hotline that’s free to initially call in to. It’s marketed towards those interested in flirting and phone sex with other callers and uses your area code to connect you with local members as well as “National Hotchat” members nationwide, if I didn’t find anyone locally that I was interested in.
In order to talk to other callers, I needed to become a “member,” which was easily achieved by buying a package of minutes. My options were (an oddly specific) 83 minutes for $25, which was touted as their most popular package, 200 minutes for $50, or 475 minutes for $95. I had options to pay via credit card, check, or even a prepay card – the type bought at gas stations and drug stores that come pre-loaded with money and a credit card insignia. The prepay option was great for discretion, but since I had no reason to hide my calls, I opted for the credit card. I was able to enter it into the system automatically, though there was an option to connect with a customer service agent if I needed help.
While these packages of time may seem like a good bit of time to work with, I thought they would be used solely for live chat with the caller(s) I connected with. I signed up for the free 5 minute trial – just a matter of pushing a few buttons. As I signed up for the free trial, which asked me for no personal or payment information, I was informed that I had to call in from the same phone to use any remaining free minutes in the future. The clock began to tick down as soon as I recorded my greeting, which was a little bit of a letdown – I barely had time to listen to 3 or 4 greetings before I’d burned through my time, let alone respond to any.
If you use chat lines infrequently, that could be a problem with this hotline. During the signup process, I was told that if I didn’t use my account for 90 consecutive days, my account would be deleted – remaining minutes and all. So if you’re planning on taking a hiatus from flirting on the phone, make sure you clear out your minutes first, because they appear to be use-them-or-lose-them.
To begin, you just record your name, then a 5 second greeting. Be aware that they really mean a 5 second greeting, I tried to skate by on a “Hey, how you doing, hit me up.” and the system scolded me and told me to try again until I’d hit that 5 second mark.
After I recorded my greeting, the timer on my minutes started and I was automatically played the first greeting from another member. After each greeting, the menu would play again – and eat up those valuable minutes each time – unless I immediately hit “3” to skip to the next greeting. If the caller is particularly long-winded in their greeting and doesn’t sound interesting, it’s easy enough just to keep hitting 3 and moving on – sort of like an audible telephone version of the Tinder app.
The rest of the phone menu was explained in this often-repeated snippet:
I was also given the option to hit 9 to repeat the menu – no thanks! – star for help, or # to re-record my greeting that was being played to other callers. At one point, I did have a question and called in to ask the operator, but they weren’t able to answer it, explaining that they handle customer service for multiple hotlines and they had minimal information on this one.